An example. Guy friend: "This bartender always wears low ride jeans that are way tight and they give her a muffin top. If she wore a taller waist it wouldn't be like that."
He followed up with: "Am I horrible for saying things like this?"
And he told me that he thought he should be nice and let her know. Because when he told his wife, she recommended that, in case the bartender was unaware. LINEFACE, PARTY OF ONE.
Back when I didn't know him so well, I would've assumed he's trolling me with shit like this, but he really just is that clueless.
It led to a good discussion about body policing and body snarking, and socialized beauty expectations and how physical traits most women have are categorized as undesirable. It also led to talk about how hard it is for women to buy jeans in the first place, and yeah, dude, I'm sure she probably is aware and maybe she doesn't like high waisted jeans or maybe she's comfortable with her body (I wanted to go on but I was feeling gracious, for some reason).
But wow. His belief that "letting her know" that her jeans give her muffin top and thinking she would appreciate his telling her is just... WOW.
Do you guys get random, weird questions like this? My boyfriend calls me his "feminist lens," which is really sweet and flattering and shows that I'm making some progress with him.
Not used to my guy friends bouncing thoughts off me like that, though. I think I've been flaunting my feminist shitassery more, lately.