I know I haven’t posted in a long time. But some of you may remember my posts about my lack of a sex life. It’s been especially frustrating since even pleasing myself (using a vibrator) has become less and less satisfying - I’ve been having trouble achieving orgasm at all, and even when I succeed, it’s sort of a let down.

Well, there was an article on lifehacker about g-spot orgasms the other day, and it suggested some toys which might help one achieve the holy grail. I ordered the Key Comet II rechargeable g-spot wand, along with a bottle of Sliquid lube. This morning I sat (lay) down to try it. I didn’t think it was charged so I decided to try it just without power. At first I thought it was a failure because I was having trouble getting it inside me. Remember I have not had sex in many years. I thought I might have to return it.

I decided to try a little harder and it finally went in. I felt around a little and at first nothing. Then I started to feel some pleasant sensations. I kept working that area and Holy Crap, I came like I haven’t come in years. And then I did it again. It was like a goddamn miracle. I tried to go for a third time but it just wasn’t happening, so I took it to wash it with soap and water and accidentally, I discovered it WAS charged. So back to the bedroom I ran, lubed it back up and tried it with the vibration on.

Oh. My. God. I nearly fainted. I can barely walk right now. I think my life has been changed forever. I had to share this miracle with somebody. I’m restraining myself from running back in and pulling the thing out again, it’s been so long since I’ve felt this good. This may be a bad thing. I may have to put myself on an orgasm diet so that I don’t screw this up.

It’s like I’ve been living on tiny sips of water for years and suddenly someone has given me a pitcher full of cold, clean water and told me I can have as much as I like. If I drink too much, that won’t be good for me, but damn, it’s nice to have a surplus.

Thanks for listening to me rave on and on about my orgasms.