Because I wholeheartedly did not. I was super excited to watch it, paid a few bucks to "rent" it via cable, and was thoroughly disappointed. Partially because of the way it portrays Detroit - "no one lives there" (except the 800,000 people who live there, right?) yet you can hop a direct flight to Madrid or get one direct from Paris (you can't.) I understand why Jim Jarmusch chose to use part of the city to film in (it is run down in parts, I don't think I need to say this bc ruin porn is EVERYWHERE) but at the same time, to have his wealthy protagonist there felt like he was "slumming" in the worst way possible, much like rich kids who choose live someplace dangerous because it's more "real". They (the protagonists) can get up and leave anytime they want, bc money. I don't know if I have a point here, this may be more of a rant.
Besides, for a vampire movie, it's really dull. I hoped that super sexy Tom Hiddleston was going to do something, I hoped that something would happen, but no, not much really. He and Tilda are such great actors, but I felt like this movie wasted their talents. I like Jim Jarmusch but wtf is this?
Did anyone like this movie?