Yesterday my wife went grocery shopping. She bought cupcakes (I’m not one for snacking on cakes). I asked if there were any other snacks for me. The answer was no which was fine, I didn’t ask for any. I wasn’t mad. If I want snacks, I should put them on the list. I tell her the same thing when I shop. If you really want it, put it on the list.

Then she asked what kind of snacks I like. We’ve been together almost 20 years. I LIKE COOKIES PAY ATTENTION. I CAN EAT ONE BOX OF COOKIES IN A SITTING. So I said, “I like cookies”. What kind she asks. I say, “lemon, gingersnaps, peanut butter, sugar.” Ok. I get the point she says. So she goes today and buys lemon cookies (yah!) and oatmeal cookies (WTF?) be nice? make a point?

I’m like, “thanks hun, but I’ve never eaten an oatmeal cookie cuz I legit don’t like them.” Now she’s mad because thinks I’m mad when I don’t care. Then I get mad because I think she’s mad that I won’t just eat the oatmeal cookies in order to avoid hurting her feelings. Oatmeal cookies are the worst cookies. I’m not going to eat them just to be nice.

So now we’ve officially had a fight about cookies and I’m so annoyed with both of us.