A mommy page I "like" on fb shared something from this page called Exposing Feminism. Here is a screenshot from the page:

Now, I'm the first to admit, I don't know a lot about feminism. Somehow, while other women my age were in college taking Women's Studies, and learning feminist perspective, I was trying to overcome my horribly abusive childhood (my stepfather terrorized all of us, he was exceptionally cruel to me) and pretending I was a normal person. I've spent the majority of my life surviving, and things like feminism, the idea/reality of privilege, and intersectionality all passed me by.


I worked in music, modeling, and later, in adult industry. Somehow, I didn't meet any feminists during that time, at least none that I was aware of. Those industries tended to be male dominated/run, and even the gigs worked that were women owned/operated weren't really all that different from gigs run by men.

Relationships were another thing I wasn't good at. I had a tendency to choose people who would hurt me, on many levels (there was one notable exception). When I got smart enough to stop being with men who hit me, I wasn't smart enough to stay away from emotional, financial, or sexual abusers.

I finally sorted that out, and I'm with a good man. Thank goodness. There's still quite a lot of aftermath to deal with. I'll probably be in therapy forever. PTSD is not easy to get over.


I have three children, with three different fathers. I used to be a stripper. I've used my physical appearance to get what I wanted. I didn't get a degree until my mid-thirties. I spent years being abused and molested as a child, and created a pattern of confusing abuse for love. I'm a people pleaser. I want to be cared for, and independent.

Until fairly recently, I was none of the things that attract good, strong, feminist women (or men). So I never learned it. I got a small taste when I went to school. I found Jezebel a few years ago, and while I read some things, I didn't attempt to study it. I was a lurker. I stumbled upon GT by chance. I became a hardcore lurker, and then a tentative commenter. Some lovely person ungreyed me, and another actually allowed me, the girl who had to Google intersectionality, to have posting privileges.

Now, I'm a student. The folk who participate in GT are my teachers. I'm learning a new vocabulary, and can put words to things that irritate, upset, or rub me the wrong way. A year ago, I would have been displeased by the aforementioned fb page, though I could not have explained why. Now, I want to learn, to know. I want to be able to help girls, women like me who didn't have the opportunity to be a part of or who lack exposure to feminist culture because of their background. I don't want them to be left behind for so many years like I was.

So, thanks you guys. For the acceptance, the patience, and the education. I promise to use it to the best of my ability.