just for a visit. I know that it isn't something that comes up much in most mainstream circles but I like to be open about it because I've come to learn that having an incarcerated family member is more common that many people would believe - it's just so marginalizing that people don't often discuss it in places like this. It's staggering to realize that for nearly every inmate, there's a mom or a brother or a wife out there whose life is also forever changed.

I just made an appointment to visit my (god)son in prison in two weeks. I haven't been to see him since he was sentenced and transferred from the county jail, nearly two years. I haven't gone because it's heartbreaking for me. He's now 23, it's been about three years and he's serving a 54 year sentence. (I won't get into the details but I will say that it was a crime in which no one was hurt and there was no danger of anyone being hurt.)

I try to remember that I'm lucky he's still here for me to visit and I can still talk to him and have him in my life. But I am so sad for the future that he's lost. It kills me to know that everything he wanted is out of reach.