I’ve had a rough week - please let me complain. I don’t need advice, but empathy and support are more than welcome. Venting about your own complaints is also more than welcome.

* I didn’t get the federal fellowship I applied for - which I knew was likely bc my score wasn’t low enough to be fundable, but I’m still really bummed and my mentor is traveling and not reachable to give me a pep talk. I already submitted a revised version of the application in response to feedback - and that gets reviewed in a month or so, so there’s still hope.

* The funding source for part of my position changed, and I haven’t been paid for Jan/Feb yet and they have no idea when all the paperwork will get through and I’ll get paid.

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* I was supposed to do something with friends last night, but the not getting paid thing made it so that I didn’t feel I could spend the money, so emailed them that they should still go. I was half hoping they’d say they didn’t want to go without me (since the whole thing was my idea and the idea was for us to all do it together) - but it looks like they went without me. I didn’t want to keep them from doing it, but am still kinda sad.

* My diss chair (who I still work with, despite having graduated) went off on me earlier this week - she thought I made a lot of mistakes on something and basically told me that I am clearly not learning and that I am still making the same mistakes over and over. The thing is - I didn’t make the mistakes she accused me of, but I just cannot defend myself when I am getting yelled at. So now she thinks I am a moron and likely has told another mentor this. And even though I know I didn’t make those errors, I still felt like a complete idiot - and this has been undergirding my reactions to all of the above all week.

* I got an email last week telling me part of my position was ending in a few months. An email. This week I learned that it was likely not financially motivated. This also has been undergirding my reactions this week. I’ll be okay - the university my mentor is joining will likely pick up the other half of my position, but still...

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On the plus side, my move to NYC with my mentor has taken one tiny step forward - but not enough of a step that I can start making any plans.

Please tell me what is going on with you!