And since my entire department is in a meeting and I'm done with all the work I was told to do during the meeting, I'm going to type this out. [TRIGGER WARNING: weight related stuff].

Some might remember about a month ago I was contemplating going on an internet date with someone I didn't find attractive. (It's not so much physical attraction as it is somethin else). Well I went on it because I wanted some socialization action, and she's totally cool. She's older than me by quite a bit and she's very inexperienced with dating. I don't care, but I'm afraid that after seeing each other a handful of times throughout the month she might be getting more into it than I am. That is to say: I'm confident she likes me a lot.

And she's pretty cool, but I'm still not feeling it, and the reason is she's over-weight. I want to talk about this with as much tact as possible because I don't put a whole lot of credence in societal beauty norms and she's totally a worthwhile person, but I am having a hard time looking past this. At the risk of sounding like a tool, her weight is... Excessive. I really don't want to sound like a douche or sound judgy, but her weight is to the point where it seriously impacts her day to day life. She has a hard time moving herself and I just find it to be a turn off. I don't know how I'm supposed to reconcile my not wanting to be with this worthwhile person with the part of me that hates fat-shaming and everything. I want to be body positive and all but wouldn't it then be hypocritical to dump her over this?


In the end though, I just don't see a strong attachment developing. What's the best way to end things? I feel like just a text out of the blue would be rude, but setting up a date and her going to the effort to be there just to be dumped would be rude too. Regardless I think I want to do it in person. Ideas on how best to break up?

I don't really know how to approach this subject And I hope I don't sound like a douche, but feel free to rake me over the coals if I didn't approach it well. I promise I'm just trying to figure out where I stand in this and I really don't want to talk about it poorly.

Can't promise a quick response because work might come calling, but I'll be around at some point.

ETA: and of course, just on the off- chance, no main page.