Some of you may be familiar with Mr. Misfit's complete ineptitude regarding domestic tasks. This is our story.
So, our garbage can sucked, right? It was about two inches too tall for tall garbage bags, which is obviously bullshit, so we decided to chuck the garbage in the garbage and replace it with a small waste basket to put under the sink. The only thing was I needed to reorganize under the sink in order for it to fit, so it sat in the old spot for a few days until I did that. So, a few days ago I organized under the sink and stuck the garbage can there. It's a reasonable place for a kitchen garbage, don't you think? I've known tons of people who keep their kitchen trash there.
So, fast forward to yesterday evening when I see a shopping bag with trash in it hanging off of one of the drawer pulls in the kitchen. This is what followed:
Me: "Honey, why is this trash hanging here? Why didn't you use the garbage can?"
Him: Silence, grabs garbage bag, scans kitchen, and walks into the living room holding the trash in his hand
Me: "Um, where are you going? Are you taking out that trash? Can you take out the kitchen trash while you're at it?"
Him: Silence, walks back into kitchen, scans the room, walks back into the living room with the trash, the door to outside where the trash goes is through the kitchen
Me: (incredulous) "Are you looking for the kitchen trash? Do you think it's in the bedroom?"
Him: Still not even a whisper of a clue as to where to trash might be, still holding the trash bag
OOPS, I GUESS THERE'S NO GARBAGE IN THE KITCHEN ANYMORE, SEEMS REASONABLE!!
I've been giggling about this all morning. This means that he hasn't known where the trash was for days and didn't say anything about it and never once thought to look under the sink. HIS DEGREE IS IN ASTROPHYSICS, YOU GUYS. I want to know what was running through his head, I'm thinking some variation of 'ohshitwheresthetrashitsnotinplainsightwhereevercoulditbeshesgonnabesopissedthatidontknowwherethetrashisfuckdidsheputitinthebedroomfuckfuckfuckwheresthetrash'.