First off, a confession. I slept with one of my exes, and he was going to come visit, and that fell apart this morning when he gave me his same old bullshit. I didn't want any drama (the sushi waiter turned out to be a clingy bust, and "doesn't read books"). I just lost a lot of friends and wanted to hang out a little and get my freak on. But when the bullshit came up, I cut off the conversation, told my sister and BIL, and then really, REALLY, REALLY I SWEAR made the decision to stop dating altogether.
I am scared as hell, but also making a lot of improvements, hanging out at my mom's, and generally drawing into myself more now that I am free from 2 back-to-back exhausting relationships that spanned nearly the last two years. Yoga is at least every other day. I'm weening off anti-anxiety medication. My novel has suddenly picked up during this break at my mom's and I'm really excited about it. Tonight, in the interest of safety and companionship, I'll be hanging out at Mom's one more night and then returning home to my kitties and my house in the morning.
Who has taken a break from dating altogether? It's not even much of a choice, I just can't. I am obviously choosing people who make me do all this damn work when I have so many talents and things to concentrate on that are for ME. Problematically, I'm not all that ready to be social yet - I have a couple of close friends here, but the holidays are coming up and I want to concentrate on family, alone time, and developing a healthy and fun routine on my own.