Because I walked by this at work, and read out of the corner of my eye "My Wife is an Asian Addict." And, so help me, I wondered aghast, "Is Matthew Perry's wife a Chinese fetishist? She only is into Asian people? How interesting (since you usually hear about white guys who will only date Chinese or Japanese women) and appalling for him, since she must not be all that into him!"

I went back and looked at it properly. "My Life As An Addict." Suddenly the story dropped both in intrigue and WTF factor. I think my contact prescription needs updating, is what I'm saying.