When a friend asked if used tampons or pads, I responded "I could write love sonnets to tampons." She joked that she would like to see that sometime. I took her at her word.
Ode to a Tampon
When I was but a lass of ten and one
And innocent: not yet a woman grown,
My life was simple: really 'twas quite zen.
My dear Aunt Flo had not her fury shown.
But then, one day, whilst I did wear white shorts,
A crimson tide did come betwixt my thighs.
I was ashamed before all my cohorts;
This lady-flow did take me by surprise.
'Twas Providence did lead me then anon
To good School Nurse, whose smile shone like a badge.
She handed me my very first tampon.
And said "Here: stick this up your vag."
Thus did begin a pure and true romance:
My cotton chum who saves my underpants.
Photo: Cat Klein
(Whom I was remiss in not crediting sooner.)