In no particular order:

1) overalls from the 1980s

2) a shit ton of Cardinals gear

3) mullets

4) Someone to ask a question with that South City 1-44 accent. You’ll know this because s’s sound like z’s and o’s sound like a’s. Example: After you eat your ahrange put the dish in the zink.

5) priest or nun in audience, possibly several in a clump of dourness

6) some Missouri idiot resident not from St. Louis asking a question and managing to say Missour-ah instead of Missouri. Assholes. This only happens outside of St. Louis. While we have our problems, mispronouncing the state isn’t one of them.

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7) someone to ask about high school education. “Where did you go to high school?” is a ubiquitous question asked constantly in St. Louis to gauge where you grew up and your family’s socioeconomic status.

Feel free to add your own