It’s been about two months since I got dumped by the last fellow I was dating from OkC, and I reactivated my profile in an effort to remind myself that there are (or may be) cool single people around my age who are not baby-crazy (nothing against the baby-havers, I’m just...not one). In the past my OkC experiences have been of one sort or the other: either I meet a succession of people who end up being creepy or weird or who I just have no chemistry with for one or two dates and that’s it (oh man do I have STORIES about the creepers), or I only end up talking to one person and date them exclusively pretty quickly.
This time around I’ve found myself in the perplexing and not altogether unpleasant situation of chatting with three very interesting fellows. They’ve each made it clear that I’m the only person they’re seeing or talking to (very flattering), and I’ve made it clear in turn that I am talking to several people. (I don’t go into detail, because that’s rude, but I feel obligated to let them know we’re coming at things from different places).
I’ve been on one date with each of these guys and they’re all super keen to meet up again. I’m keen to meet up with each of them too, and plan to do so. With gusto. So far things have been pretty tame (two out of three dates ended with a hug, and one with a brief makeout, which was great. Interestingly the makeout was with the guy who I would probably be least likely to notice in my day-to-day life, and who was a little less cute in person than he was in photos. He is also REALLY SWEET and hilarious, which has a delightful way of making people exceptionally attractive...)
Basically I am feeling a little uncertain about what the protocol is here, and feel obligated to figure things out sooner rather than later (this might be totally misguided, but I hate the idea of “stringing [anyone] along.”)
So far I’m already trying to do things a little differently by taking things WAY SLOW, not ruling people out too early*, and spending time with guys who, while attractive, are not the kind of panty-dropping hot fellows I’ve found myself tangled up with in years past. (Don’t get me wrong, panty-dropping hot is great, it just tends to be correlated with panty-chafing arrogance. I think all of these guys are handsome in their own right).
*one dude interrupts, A LOT. He interrupts and immediately apologizes. I don’t know if it’s just a case of first date nerves or if it’s a permanent feature. Second dude got out of an engagement four or five months ago, which seems like a potential red flag. Third dude is potentially kind of pretentious (used to be a chef, is kind of haughty about food), but again, maybe it comes across as a little more clunky because he was nervous.
So, wise GT friends: have you juggled multiple dates? How/when did you figure out when to cut things off? Is it dumb for me to approach things this way? SLAY ME WITH YOUR WISDOM.