1) An eye-roll.

2) J - a person who thinks using google is just as good as traveling somewhere. WHAT

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For context, he mentioned the Notre Dame. I haven’t been, BUT I KNOW THAT CAN’T BE RIGHT, J.

3) Creep - a person with whom I have a high match rating, and I responded to once. He immediately offered me his phone number, and has sent me seven additional messages, some of which prove he can’t read. I can tell that he has looked at my profile at least as many times today. I may have to block. I am infinitely glad he does not have my first name.

4) Mr.99% - A title given by my best friend in jest but is sticking. Before I answered more questions, we had a ridiculous 99% match rating. It is still very high, which is intriguing despite my skepticism of these algorithms.

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He read my profile! We are talking about a wide variety of things! I am into it! I am freaking out a little!

I am fascinated and repulsed by this dumb site. I can’t fucking imagine dealing with tinder.