Ew. Gross. Stop. Boss, why are you doing this in front of me. Why do you insist on eating lunch while we meet and loudly and continuously smacking your lips and even sometimes chewing with your mouth open while you talk. I feel physically nauseated. Stopppppppppppppp. Even after you finish your bite you still keep “chewing”. HOW.

There’s no good way to say this, but you are an old man and you eat like one. Loudly and abrasively. I’m sure not all old men do this, but many of them do, including my Dad, so you know what I mean. And then you offered me some of your potato chips and I almost threw up and then you made fun of me for refusing something “unhealthy”.

UUUUGH WHY DID YOU SCHEDULE US FOR A “RIGHT AFTER LUNCH MEETING” EVERY DAY THIS WEEK NOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Update: Please don’t tell me about how this woman is a bitch for not giving us money when you “helped” her find couches to crash on when she was leaving an abusive husband 20+ years ago.