WHITE MAN WRITES BOOK, IS SOMEHOW NOT IMMEDIATELY HANDED PUBLISHING CONTRACT

Read for a laugh! This is just so good you guys. Here are a couple of great moments:

No matter how hard you think you have it, someone always has it worse. This is perhaps the strongest lesson we can learn from Michael Wolff's heart-wrenching USA Today profile (titled "White Men Tell Stories Too") of Kevin Morris, a struggling big-time entertainment lawyer who wrote a book that no one wanted to publish because he is a part of an oppressed minority.

Advertisement

Now, one wonders exactly why a first-time writer, who has never published any fiction before in his whole life, might not be offered a publishing deal on his first novel. Could it be that it wasn't that great? Or that he just wasn't a good fit? OR, was it because he was a middle-aged white American man telling the story of a middle-aged white man and no one cares about middle-aged American white men anymore because women and minorities have stolen all the literary fiction for themselves.

We are mutherfucking bandits and thieves, I tell you. US BITCHES.

Look what happens when we ladies read, just look...

Wolff suggests that perhaps our entire culture has turned against the idea of white men telling the stories of white men, even though there is such a grand tradition of white men telling the stories of white men. He suggests that "white male media" is now a "lost form or marginalized genre" Who is to blame? Women. For reading.

"The echoes here are of a former generation of American writers — John Cheever, John Updike, Raymond Carver. But, as it happens, fiction is now largely a form dominated by women readers and hence women's stories. Or, it is too, in many of its recently celebrated instances, a form for exploring overlooked cultures — leaving, arguably, that middle-aged, culturally undistinguished, American male as now the most overlooked."

JUST LOOK AT WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE TEACH WOMEN TO READ! We miss out on the rich inner lives of dudes like Hollywood lawyer Kevin Morris. Le sigh. Just think of all the white men out there who probably want to write novels, and here we all are clogging up the publishing industry with our garbage women stories.

Here's the rest.