A miserable, smelly, petty human being. If the mention of your presence fills your employees with scorn and dread, spirits seem to lag when you're around, and people constantly mention they aren't being given the proper information or funding to follow the mandates you bitch them out for not doing, then the problem probably rests with you. Not us. Also you are doing illegal shit by taking tips from us. We keep it quiet because it's nice to have a consistent salary and company provided healthcare but even if it wasn't cheating us it's cheating the customers who tip us in good faith and we know it's only going to line your own deep pockets and pet projects because we're understaffed and this place is filled with shitty out of date on-its-last-legs equipment. The shit you're doing is illegal so you should really be nicer (or at least decent) to us and at least put that money into fixing things that break in this fucking shithole or else someone will spill the beans someday. That is all.
No, that is not all. Fuck you, owner. Fuuuuuucccccccccccckkkkkkkkkk you. You smell really bad. Seriously. I know you don't believe in soap but it exists. As does deodorant. People can smell you before they see you-this is how I, personally, know when you are around.
...whew. That felt better. Thanks for letting me vent, GT. This week at work was hell and it's probably only going to get worse now that the owner is around. He made some mandates today that really made me mad.