1) Wait...what? Why am I $200 short of where I should be, and when did I buy something at Jack-in-the-Box? The only thing I know about Jack-in-the-Box is they have creepy-ass commercials.
2) ...oh, shit, is my bank the number that's been calling me the last three days? I thought it was just another student loan debt collector trying to get a hold of me. *checks voicemail* Yup, that was my bank.
3) What the fuck did they buy, anyway? *checks online* ...what? They got drunk and bought some wigs? ...seriously? That...seriously? Am I in a Judd Apatow movie all of a sudden?
4) Wow, I hope my bank is good about dealing with this.
5) Wow, I'm glad my bank was good about dealing with this.