* panicking over vaginal bleeding

* crying in the car while your husband calls a colleague to tell your boss know you might not be back today

* getting into an emergency doctor visit

All is well, though. Fuckin’ polyp, man! We’ve known it was there, but the doctor was waiting to take any action because it was still early, they didn’t know how far up in my uterus it was (it was hanging out through my cervix) and they sometimes just naturally fall off.

Anyway, now Mr. Nom and I can add, “watched a doctor remove a bleeding uterine polyp” to our “Grossly Fascinating Bonding Activities” list.

And you’re damn right I asked to see it when they took it out. For a polyp, it was large. Tip of my pinky finger. If you’re unfamiliar, they’re usually benign growths and, boy, do they look it.

The good news is after cock-blocking us for the last two months, we’ve been cleared to resume sex in a week!

Actual picture of my polyp: