There's really no easy way to say this, so I'm just going to say it. A week ago, I did a stupid, awful thing and publicly told Clashtalk to "go fuck themselves" in a post that consisted of that and nothing else. There wasn't any real reason for this other than my own issues — at least, not any reason that holds any weight whatsoever. It was absolutely and in every way uncalled-for, and I should not have done it. There is no excuse, defense, or justification for this, so I'm not going to try to provide one. My mental and emotional state at the time is, frankly, irrelevant; it doesn't matter what was going on with me, it shouldn't have happened — period. It is absolutely no one's fault but my own that I acted like a complete douchenozzle. I owe a huge apology to the entire Clashtalk board.

I owe a further apology for the fact that this is only coming out now, after EmpressFoofypants called me on it — the decent thing for me to have done would have been to apologize right away. This was not what I did. Again, I can't justify this. I behaved like a dickish, spoiled child, and have no one to blame but myself.

The biggest apology is one I owe to brotherparish. I have no idea, in retrospect, why I singled them out, but there really was no call to do so. I fixated, and said hurtful shit, and it was a hugely dickish move on my part. They absolutely did not deserve any single thing I said about them.

I don't expect to be allowed into the Clashtalk clubhouse after this, now or ever. I don't deserve to, and I won't ever come disturb your space. I'm not asking for anyone to forgive me for being such an asshat, and I certainly don't begrudge anyone who still dislikes me for it — I probably would too, were I in your shoes. I just hope that maybe people can find some satisfaction in my admission of guilt, because the more I think about this, the more angry I get at my own behavior, and there needs to be SOME recompense — and at this point, this is the only way I can figure to provide it.