I've been having issues with my girlfriend for the past few months, and lately I've been trying to do my best to be proactive to talk to her about the things that are bothering me or how to improve our relationship (yeah, yeah, it's taken me a while to take the initiative).

Our sex life has been in the shitter for a long time and it's only getting worse (as far as I'm concerned). Anyway, this morning we had sex for the first time in a few weeks, so afterward I tried talking to her about our sex life or lack thereof as it was relevant. I thought I was asking questions that were pretty clear like if there was something I'm not doing in bed that I should be doing, is she comfortable with how often we have sex, etc. I was met with a lot of shrugging and mumbling. I told her I was just trying to assess the situation; she said she she understood that was my intent, but other than that she didn't say anything helpful.

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This isn't the first time I've had a conversation like this with her and have it go the same way. I know I'm not the effective communicator myself, but the older I get the more I can tell what is appropriate and what's not ... and I feel like trying to talk to her about serious stuff is like pulling teeth. It's like I'm talking to a petulant teenager — not a 30-year-old woman, and it's driving me insane.

I've been trying to work through my issues and feelings with her, but to be honest, I am kind of ready to break up with her. I'm also not really ready to break up with her at the same time. I know I'm just biding my time until ... something, and I feel like a really shitty person for it. What a mess.