1. I went to my appointment at Planned Parenthood, got through the entire thing without crying, and left with a new birth control.
2. I reached out to my boyfriend before I went in and told him that I was scared and asked him to think good thoughts for me. That was a huge step for me, I hate asking for help and risking looking needy, but he was very supportive and I’m glad I was honest with him.
3. I managed to eat relatively well today despite the fact that I was incredibly freaked out and stressed, which usually lends itself to eating a bunch of crap. I had eggs and toast with fruit for breakfast, salad for lunch, and I’m heating up some leftover pasta with a veggie-heavy sauce and some zucchini for dinner. I did get a bottle of Prosecco on my way home, but that’s to celebrate the fact that today was the last day of the semester.
4. I booked a moving company for my move in two weeks.
5. I took my German final and I think I did relatively well.
6. I also found out that I for-sure passed my Biology class, which I was the most worried about because it was online and I had a hellishly hard time with it. I’m gladly taking my C and moving on.
7. I called my new friend when I felt like I was having a panic attack mid afternoon and she just listened and was friendly and very supportive. I didn’t isolate myself, which was my first instinct.
8. I bought some wrapping paper and a few more christmas gifts.
9. I bought some premade cookie dough so I can bake cookies in the morning to take to the choir holiday picnic tomorrow afternoon. I was going to make cranberry white chocolate bar cookies from scratch, but I’m way too tired. Shortcuts FTW. Giving myself a break FTW.
10. I realized that the waiter at the restaurant I went to last night kept my ID when I tried to buy wine at the grocery store today. I drove down to the restaurant to collect it (through rush hour), and I did not get overly frustrated or lose my shit on anyone that was there, despite feeling incredibly edgy and irritated that I had to make the trip.
11. I’m sitting on the couch now instead of pushing myself to go get up and run a few miles on the treadmill/start furiously packing my apartment up. I’m tired. My body is tired. I couldn’t sleep last night from being worried about the appointment and I’ve been very agitated and panicky all day. It’s okay to rest. I have to remind myself of that a lot. It’s okay to rest. It’s okay to rest. I need this.
I’ve got to be honest, my depression is still screaming hormone addled, self-hating nonsense at me, but I’m doing my best to distract myself and not listen to it. I have warm blankets, I have food to eat, and I can sleep late tomorrow. It’s going to be okay.
What went right for you today, GT?