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98-lb Weakling Workout Playlist

First off, I want to say a big "thank you" for the authorship privileges. I promise to be a good little monkey.

I've been getting into a workout routine for the past month or so. I had heard that regular exercise (fun fact: exercise is a word I can never spell right the first time. I am an English professor.) is good for depression, at least as effective as medication or therapy. I'm on medication, and I figured that the exercise would be a good supplement. If one is as good as the other, why do I need both? Well, I the medication helps me get over gym-related anxiety, e.g. "How can I comfortably lift 5 lb dumbells while standing next to Hans and Frans, who are bench pressing 300 lbs while wearing chains and a breath mask that simulates high altitude workouts?" and "Wait, I need to shower, which will mean getting nude while there are other dudes around, and some of them will also be nude and what if they think I'm staring at their junk while I'm really just staring off into space being anxious about this, and OMG WHAT IF IT'S ONE OF MY STUDENTS?!?" This is what goes through my head on a regular basis. And if the exercise doesn't really help the depression (and so far, I think it does), I still get the health benefits of no longer being a 98-lb weakling (okay, more than 98. But I'm a good example of how "being thin" is very different from "being healthy.")


What keeps me going the most while working out is my carefully crafted Workout playlist on Google Play Music. It has over 350 songs, so I usually get a pretty good variety each workout day. Here, for example, is my list from today's workout (stretches, 10 minutes of cardio, then a dumbell-only workout routine I downloaded for the JEFIT app on my phone.)

1. MC Chris vs. The Cure, "Close to Freaks remix"

You have got to listen to this one. It is freaking awesome.

2. Dizzy Gillespie, "Hot Mallets"

Every once in a while, the music player will fuck up and skip to the next track. That happened here, before the mallets got even slightly warm.

3. MC Chris, "Tractor MySpace"

MC Chris is problematic — he has a history of being a douche, and some of his music can be pretty misogynistic. But this is a song about sex that I feel isn't too demeaning to women. I hope?


4. The Beatles, "Birthday"

5. Barenaked Ladies , "Spider in My Room"

6. Radiohead, "Paranoid Android"

7. They Might be Giants, "Spy"

The version from Why Does the Sun Shine, not the John Henry version.

8. DocMario + MC Chris, "Jelly Inside (Beep Remix)"

MC Chris's latest album, Race Wars, was pretty disappointing, but the remixes off of it were good.


9. Pearl Jam, "Whipping"

From the undeservedly derided album Vitalogy

10. Gorillaz, "Demon Days"

11. Beck, "E-Pro"

12. They Might be Giants, "Don't Let's Start."

13. They Might be Giants, "Destination Moon"

14. Charlie Parker, "52nd St. Theme"

15. 10 Cent, "Yup."

Okay, have any of you heard of 10 Cent? Ph.Mom bought this CD ages ago, before we met, when she was living in Arizona. I have literally never met anyone who is familiar with this group, and the fact that they spell their name with a cent sign (which I am too lazy to look up the ALT+ code for) makes them difficult to Google. They sound very 90s; it's a poppy sort of trip-hop vibe.


16. Prodigy, "Fuel My Fire"

What's the deal with Prodigy's name? When I saw them at Lollapalloza in 97, they were just "Prodigy," but it seems like their always listed at The Prodigy, as though I would confuse them with some other prodigy.


17. Stone Temple Pilots, "Wicked Garden."

Yes, I do realize the 90s are over, but that doesn't mean I have to admit it.

18. MC Chris, "Awesome Bartender"

19. They Might be Giants, "Circular Karate Chop"

20. They Might be Giants, "Where Your Eyes Don't Go"

21. Mumford & Sons, "Little Lion Man."

22. Stan Getz, "Tour's End"

23. Macklemore & Ryan Lewis, "Thrift Shop"

24. Muse, "Invincible"

And that's a good song for the end of a workout. And now I should probably do some productive things....

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