I really wanted to respond to this, but did not want to give this person the dignity of having their response to my post pulled it of the greys. I had written a post where I mentioned that my brother is adopted from South Korea, and has disabilities, and how people would say things to my parents like "Why didn't you send him back?" Here's a reply that I got:

"I wonder why your parents did what they did?

If they really needed another kid why not adopt a local child of your ethnicity and race?

I never understand such selfish people, I would never be able to adopt a kid from different country and ethnicity knowing that there is a child of my own race and ethnicity suffering in orphanage.

Thats just evil."


Maybe because my parents aren't racist, and were looking to help a child, fullstop? How the hell is that selfish?


My parents had always planned on having two kids of their own, and adopting one. It was the seventies, and Mia Farrow's adoptions had put international adoptions in the news. The Canadian International Development Agency (CIDA) was arranging flights of Korean orphans to Canada, and so it was easier and faster to get an infant from abroad than it was to go through the domestic foster care system. (No orphanages in Canada. Where did you think this happened? Dickensian England?)

Unlike Canada, there were children living in orphanages in South Korea. And, as my brother's case illustrates, they weren't getting great care, because TB should never progress to meningitis in a healthy person who is receiving the proper medications. It's been speculated that one of his caregivers may have been selling his TB meds, but we'll never know for sure.


My brother almost certainly never would have had the medical interventions for his cerebral palsy as a kid in an orphanage in Korea that he got in Canada. He almost certainly never would have been adopted in a Confucian Society, where great emphasis is placed on blood ties, especially when his disability is taken into account. What my parents did is not, by any stretch of the imagination, evil.

If there is any evil here, well, then in the immortal words of Xander Harris "Whoever smelt it, dealt it."