Hello Groupthink! You marvelous, much-smarter-than-me people! I need some advice.

I am a terribly awkward creature, and I never say the right thing. Usually, I just stick with not speaking, because it's the only way to ensure I don't say something weird or inappropriate.

So...how do I send condolences? I don't know what to do when someone dies other than feel sad about it. But I'm supposed to say something.

My aunt recently died. I was not able to fly out for the funeral (I actually can't handle funerals, too many people with too many emotions in an enclosed space & I have a panic attack & shut down), they didn't want flowers sent out, but I need to call or write or say something to my uncle. But this involves a level of communication skill I don't have. I am not good at words. Or emotions. Help? What do I say/do here?