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Am I searching for a unicorn?

I have never, not once, had a decently saturated lip color that stays on well, doesn't dry out my lips, and isn't impossible to remove the remnants of, particularly not those in my price range.

I tried this one today (also this is the actual color - CANNOT BELIEVE I thought this was red):

Illustration for article titled Am I searching for a unicorn?
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Not only did I think it was red when I bought it and before I left my house (when it is clearly pink, ARGH), my lips are so freaking dry that I had to dry them out more with the bathroom soap in order to get them clean enough to put chapstick on.

So is what I'm searching for something that doesn't exist in my price range? I'd rather not spend $30 on a lipstick.

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