I grew up watching Miss USA and Miss America, even though Miss Maine never wins anything. My babysitter was Miss Maine in 1979 and my cousin in 1985. I watched more pageants than I should have and like a good future Red Sox fan (well, before 2004), I got used to losing every year. But they do much better in the Miss USA pageant, who are the less impressive contestants generally but still, second runner up once. WOOO. IT'S A VIABLE COMPETITION FOR MAINE.

Ps, I don't need to know the feminist implications of this show. I know. I KNOW.