Yesterday must have been a real slow news day in Pasadena, Calif. (Okay, let's be real here — every day is a slow news day in Pasadena.) How slow you ask? Well, slow enough that Pasadena Star-News editor Frank Girardot thought it would be a great opportunity to write an op-ed railing against the culinary menace wreaking havoc across the Southland: The Cronut.
Ever since New York City chef Dominique Ansel unveiled his gluttonous donut/croissant hybrid to the masses, donut shops and bakeries across the Greater Los Angeles region have scrambled to replicate the pastry in an attempt to capitalize on the Cronut Craze. There are lists on nearly every single local website breaking down the best "Faux-nuts" in the L.A. region — and even the Los Angeles Times is getting into the game. Yesterday, the Times featured this all-important headline on their webspite's front page: "Is this the closest thing in L.A. to the real Cronut?"
According to Girardot, the clamor for Cronuts harms the hundreds of "real" donut shops that dot the L.A. region. Donut shops, he writes, are awesome because donuts are cheap. Cronuts, on the other hand, are too damn expensive:
I can get a dozen doughnuts for $6.75 at Olympic Doughnuts or a dozen long-stem roses at Vons for like $9.99 why would I spend $60 bucks for a box of Cronuts?
Why, indeed! Heck, Girardot doesn't care how much time or work goes into the making of Ansel's signature treat. Besides, he writes, donut shops hire convicts (*clutches pearls*) — and even those "wards of the state" don't take three days to make a donut like the privileged nincompoops at Ansel's bakery:
I like the way doughnut stores do business. They hire some guy who’s willing to fry dough from 11 p.m. to 6 a.m. and put sugar on it. He could even be a convict. There’s not a whole process to arrive at deliciousness, it just happens.
There’s probably no former wards of the state in Ansel’s shop. The Gianni Versace of fried dough only sells a couple of Cronuts to each customer.
Girardot's rant against the almighty Cronut falls in the same category as the "Old Man Yells at Cloud" type of NIMBY-ism that's all too popular among op-ed journalists at suburban newspapers. The Cronut, in all its decadent glory, is simply too much for Girardot to process — and, to him, any attack against it is worth valuable editorial space. Just goes to show that, when it comes to trendy baked goods, it seems like parents, newspaper columnists, and donut lovers everywhere just don't understand.