Welcome To The Bitchery

So my really good friend's bachelorette party was yesterday. We spent the day out on the lakes, boating, eating, drinking (I even had a little sangria! naughty I know!), then ate some more, got all dolled up, and walked down to the bar on the water for some dancing and live music. It was a ton of fun. I made it to about midnight before I had a couple friends walk me back so I could go to sleep. They all came back a bit after bar close and the bachelorette ran into my room screaming "Is this LizzHaa's room? LizzHaa? I got you this magazine I'm gonna put it under your pillow!" and then she ran out. Turns out my sweet, little friend loves to steal shit when she's wasted. She took a couple letters from the sign outside the bar and then proceeded to take mail from people's mailboxes. Anything important my other friends made sure to put back but she wouldn't let the magazine go. The magazine in question? Parents. I thought it was really sweet in a drunken klepto kind of way.

But I also want to talk about drunk guys and how big of blinders they put on themselves when drinking and around pretty girls. I was wearing a cute black dress that made my tits looks awesome (if I do say so myself) and sort of camouflaged my bump. I mean I didn't really think it did because when I look down it's like BAM! pregnant lady but all my friends swore I didn't look pregnant from a straight on perspective. But I had so.many.guys try to grind up on me. It was really fucking annoying (oh and a teeny bit flattering I admit) after a while because they were not respecting the bump and sometimes I felt like they were being a bit rough. So I politely declined but didn't have the balls to say "look I'm pregnant, I don't want to dance." and I don't know why. I think I was afraid of getting a horrified look from them when they realized they were macking on a preggo. Finally one of my girlfriends started rubbing my belly in an obvious way and that seemed to get some of them to back off. When I told Mr. Haa about it, he laughed, shrugged and said "You never know, maybe they knew. It's a big turn on to some guys." I mean I sort of get it, I feel very sexy at this point, but I want Mr. Haa to find me sexy not some random dude on the street. It felt really dirty.


Share This Story

Get our newsletter