Day One

Bedbugs seen: 0

New Bites: Possibly up to three? There are three bites that might be new, but I can’t remember, and one of them looks more like a mosquito bite (asymmetrical welt surrounded by asymmetrical redness—bedbug bites are perfectly round with a bright red dot in the center). They’re also not clustered, which gives me hope. Most LA laundromats keep several doors open to keep cool, so it’s totally possible I got a mosquito bite cleaning all our clothes yesterday.

How Drunk I Got: Should have been a 5/10 based on the amount of alcohol, but was really more of a 7/10 because of how tired I was.

How Much I Spent In My Victory Drunk Haze: Approximately $70. $18 on Greek delivery food (a falafel pita, fries, and side salad, plus tip), and approximately $46 on new bras, because in cleaning all my clothes I realized I hate most of my bras and only like the ones from Aerie.

How Paranoid I Currently Feel: 5/10. I’m concerned about the possibly new bites, although they can take several hours or days to appear, so they could be from yesterday’s up close and personal encounter with the little bastards, or they could be from some fucker we missed. But we saw zero signs of bedbugs anywhere but physically on the mattress and box spring, neither on the pillows nor the comforter nor the wall. They may be contained. Time will tell. Time and its cruel march onward towards death.

Odd Side Effects: Our bedroom and clothing smell pleasantly of sweet cinnamon, because cinnamon oil is one of the active ingredients in the Rest Easy spray and I sprayed out the whole 16 ounce bottle on the mattress and box spring, where the carpet meets the wall, and in our dresser.

And I finally got Mr. PKB to get rid of the keyboard that’s been under our bed for the past three years, that doesn’t have a power cord, and he’s never used. Put it in the alley and it was gone in an hour.

This whole thing also justified all my work and nagging about decluttering and getting rid of stuff we don’t need. Mr. PKB said it was way easier this round (we did in a day what had taken him three or four days) in part because we had way less stuff and way fewer clothes.

Total Cost So Far: $490, between supplies, laundromat costs, take out food, and drunk shopping. The biggest chunk were the enclosures: they run an easy $100 each for queen size.