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Breaking News: Old White Man realizes rape actually happens!

This guy is the EPITOME of the liberal dude who thinks he is such a good feminist and wants a cookie but is actually a piece of shit constantly misses the entire point of everything. He is the guy who puts “feminist” in his Tinder profile and constantly tells you on the date how his lack of manners is actually him respecting you (“I’d offer to pay for dinner, but you know, I don’t want you to think I’m one of those guys who doesn’t respect a woman enough to let her pay, but FYI I do have soooo much money I could pay with so its not a money thing).


Please read this and tell me your favorite part. I can sum it up quickly for anyone on the go:

“I am a genius with a penis who needs to let EVERYONE know this ENORMOUS revelation I have just had that I don’t know if anyone has realized. Did you ever think that maybe women everywhere were not just lying when they said rape occurs frequently. This is just occurring to me now, despite the following

  • all of the news reports in the world, several of which I reference
  • all of the other women in the world telling me how often it happens (as a feminist, it’s my job to talk about women, not to listen to them, amirite???)
  • my own mother, with whom I clearly have some issues, referring to her experiences with rape culture

Let me go off on a quick tangent here, trying to tie this rape thing back to something I am more of an expert on, like bullying, (did I mention I am a prodigy? *tinkling laugh*) and then go into a long personal and self aggrandizing story, where I make this all about me and how we should change this because MY mother was impacted (which I’ve only now just realized, despite her saying so many years ago).

The end.

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