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Brutal Honesty: How much is too much?

So I've been dating this guy for a while (two-ish months?) and I don't think things are working out. It always takes me some time to sort through my feelings when it comes to things like this, and in the mean time I've gotten hit with my semi-annual bout of mild depression which when combined with my introvert nature means I become a hermit.

This is crap timing due to the plethora of parties and such happening EVERY WEEK for the rest of the year because I love my friends and my family but I don't want to be around anyone but maybe a short list of people for more than a few hours at a time. I get very quickly overloaded on social time when I'm in this kind of mood and retreat to my house and my dog and copious amounts of alone time to sit at my computer and write.

So! I don't think things are working out with this very nice guy I've been seeing. He's fun, he's nice, he treats me very well. BUT, he looks at me with stars in his eyes and it squicks me out. He doesn't take no for an answer gracefully when he wants a hug/kiss/cuddle (note: there is nothing coercive or assaultive in his behavior, he is NOT pushy about sex, but if we are watching a movie I don't want to make out the entire time. If we are having a conversation, I don't need to sit in your lap to do it. Stop that.) He is too grabby outside of bed and not grabby enough in bed. He is super enthused about things and the fact that I am not super enthused about those things (most of the time because they're ME which is fucking ANNOYING) makes me feel guilty and like a fuddy duddy. :( I'm not a fuddy duddy! I have fun! And like things! But I don't get all squee and grabby hands about myself.


I'm genuinely struggling to figure out if I'm done with this because a) I'm happy being alone (true) b) I'm struggling with seasonal depression (also true) or c) because he's not the right one for me (I suspect true). Or some combination thereof?

So, GT. If I break it off with this guy, how much truth do I owe him? He is not a bad person, he is not a bad boyfriend, he is lovely and kind. I like him a lot as a person. He is recovering from some SHITTY relationships and I don't want to kill his confidence by being like "hey, everything you think is adorable and being a good boyfriend sort of is terrible in my eyes" in part because I know my reaction is driven by my depression and how long it's been since I was in a supportive, caring, and/or not long distance relationship.

Help me, GT. Help me sort my brain out.


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