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Burnin' State of Mind (cw: health/brain)

I finally got to talk to my neurosurgeon today and I could be getting my surgery in a matter of weeks. Except that conflicts with my parents’ vacation plans. Which I totally eyerolled about but they’d lose a ton of money.

Now it’s trying to schedule it so it doesn’t interfere with my derby and my parents’ vacation and it’s kinda like, hold on, this is brain surgery, shouldn’t it take priority? But at the same time, I kinda want to enjoy some stuff if the surgery goes terribly, horribly wrong (2-10% chance of that). And also, I have friends who will actually visit me in hospital. Like for the first time ever, I have a tangible support system. So I feel like I don’t necessarily need my parents 24/7.

Right now my brain has decided to set itself on fire in protest of its impending breach. Thanks, brain. Also, I figure it’s a really good time to learn ASL as temporary hearing loss and facial paralysis are in those 2-10% side effects. But whateves. I want this shithead tumor out. Whatever happens, happens.

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