Thanks. It is very much appreciated.

This is how I feel right now:

I have not punched the cat. Yet. But if I find out either one of those little shits are on an admissions board...

So around the Captain's and my second anniversary, I had a startling revelation: I really do not like working in television. Well...that's depressing, considering I spent 3 years in film school, graduated early to come back and pursue that, and had been working steadily until I got sick in 2010. I was determined to get back to working in the industry, and I did last year. But by September, I knew: I fucking hate this with the heat of a thousand fiery suns and I will straight up murder the next person who tells me casting or hiring white is a "creative decision."

I've always loved school. I'm good at it, I'm snobby and can even manage to be academic when I'm not being as ass for the sheer pleasure of it (not to mention that I LEGALLY CHANGED MY INITIALS TO A.S.S). Obviously, going back to grad school was an A+ crackerjack of a decision.

Many tears, screams, and tons of money I couldn't really spare later, I had successfully applied to 10 grad schools for an MFA in Creative Writing (all fully funded programs).

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Let's go down the list:

UT Austin - Rejected, didn't make it past the first round

Vanderbilt - Rejected, didn't make it past the second round

U Iowa - Rejected, didn't make final round

LSU - Rejected, but they were very nice about it

UM - Rejected, and they were DICKS about it. Actual quote from my rejection email:

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Please know that our decision is meant to negate neither your talent nor your prospects—it is simply our collective judgment that others have first claim on our attention for now.

In other words, don't feel bad: WE just think you suck.

Which now leaves us with the eerie silence from:

UCI - who flat out posted on their website that they don't bother to notify rejects unless you ask in writing AFTER the April 15 deadline almost all grad schools have. Basically, either you're in...or UCI is just not into you and you should really take that silence as a BIG HINT.

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Notre Dame - They have to let me in right? THEY ALLOWED NICHOLAS SPARKS IN. Plus, I'm Catholic. Go God.

UNLV - Mostly for the fact that it's tied to the Black Mountain Institute. And it's Las Vegas.

Boston University - My alma mater - DON'T HATE ON AN ALUMNA, BU! COME ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN...

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Emerson - They let me apply for free, so...why not? Plus, I really, really, really miss Boston. Also, I hear some cool kids are in that vicinity.

*HEADDESK*

I'm seriously starting to feel as if I am going to explode and lose what's left on my guts on this. I mean, this isn't like I'm asking to be accepted into a program of actual academic merit (even I have to be honest about that), and it's not like I'm not used to being rejected (hello rejection, my old friend...), but COME. THE. FUCK. ON.

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Sigh...maybe it was a mistake to send a sample about a noir crime thriller guy who is killed by the gods in order to solve the mystery of where Jesus has gone. But funny.

Please: tell me all your most rageaholic moments from grad school, so I don't feel so alone.