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Can we talk about my kid for a just a sec?

I am having my first real moment of parenting anxiety. The halfpence is 4 in a few months, and he's a really great kid. I can count the number of tantrums he's had on one hand, he's funny and smart, all that jazz. But I am starting to worry about his emotional development.

He's at a daycare/preschool he's attended since 6 months. Yesterday one of his teachers asked me if I've noticed any changes in his behavior lately, which I haven't. Apparently he's been having these breakdowns all week. From what she told me, it sounds like it is due to frustration. One example she provided was when he was working on a project, cutting a paper plate inward concentrically so that it "snaked." She said it was perfect, until the very end when it got a little kooky, and he totally had a meltdown (he gets this from me, I get frustrated if I can't do things perfectly and am so anal, I changed the title of my post to end with "second" and then "moment" and then "sec" because the tracking on the question mark and last letter of the above words were bugging me...I also can only change the television volume in increments of 5 or it gives me very real stress).

She went on to say that he's very smart, so I asked about when he will be able to move to the next and last room (there are four classrooms, starting with infants) as it's more structured and academic. Apparently they only move kids to this room a year prior to their starting kindergarden. My son was born when California started moving back its enrollment dates, born late September, so he won't be able to start kindergarden until he's a few weeks away from his 6th birthday. Another kicker is that his best friend in his class is moving to this room next month, which I hadn't realized.


I am starting to have the worries about his academic and emotional development not syncing. I know it's fine for kids to be older, especially boys. I am not worried about that as much as making sure I'm conscious of and advocating for one area while teaching him the nuances of the other.

I just don't really know much about kids, frankly. And I don't want to be a parent that gets all whipped into a tizzy over nothing. But I also don't want to just sit on my ass and figure everything will just work itself out. My ex's mom was a superintendent and has her masters in education so she's my go-to for these concerns/questions, but his parents are in Norway for like 5 weeks! I know she is very firm about not having kids skip ahead (once they are in proper school). He will definitely be going to public school so I guess we're going to have to do some supplementing. I am not meaning to sound like the kid is a genius, he's not. He's normal, but being a year older than all the other kids will make a difference.

On another note, there's the whole being split from his father thing. At the moment the schedule is not balanced (I have him during the week) but once we settle in somewhere we will go to 50/50. I keep myself awake at night trying to put myself in his little kid brain—what must it be like to have two different homes at that age? I'm a little freaked that I am screwing him over in that regard :-(

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