Saw this sign at the hardware store today. Someone had bred a special tulip variety for the 150th anniversary of Canadian confederation next year, and apparently we are all chomping at the bit to get some bulbs.
In related hardware store news, don’t uncoil fly catching strips until you are certain your step stool is high enough to allow you to reach the ceiling.
Also make sure you clean all the cooking oil you used to destick your skin off of your arm before you sit down and rest your arm on the leg of your shorts.
That is all.