My almost 21-year old cat, who has attacked this particular neighborhood kid twice now.

Last night, my neighbor came over to ask if I could pick up her kid from daycare because she had parent-teacher conferences. Her 4 year old toddled in behind her and saw my cat sitting on the couch. She’s a cute cat, there’s no doubt. But she’s a b*tch and HATES children. She’s hissed at him before and scratched him when he cornered her under my desk (no claws though).

He was gently petting her while she sat on the couch, but she hissed at him. His mom warned him. I warned him. I tried to calm her down, but she was NOT having it. In an instant, she clawed him. I yelled at her, she took off running, and he went screaming to his mom.

The little kid worked himself up into hiccuping tears, all while his mom tried to comfort him while also explaining that the cat still doesn’t want to be petted and he needs to leave her alone.

The mom was totally fine about the cat scratching her kid. “He needs to learn!” she said, as she shrugged.

On her way out of the house, she joked about moving back to NZ if He Who Shall Not Be Named was elected (she’s a Kiwi). This morning, I asked if she could adopt BF and I so we can go with them when she moves her family back to NZ. She said she’ll take as many as she can.

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As for the cat, this is the second time she’s attacked this particular little kid. She’s also hissed at his brother, scratched at another neighborhood kid (swiped, but only got his shirt), hissed at and nearly scratched my 4-year-old niece, and scratched the Comcast man. She ALWAYS gives warnings, like hissing or ears back. But people (adults and kids) ignore these warnings and go on trying to pet her anyway. She’s nearly 21 years old. She’s not interested in being nice to people or kids she doesn’t know and doesn’t like. She isn’t going to change. But all the kids thinks she SO CUTE and they keep wanting to pet her.

Boyfriend and I talked and decided we’re putting down firmer rules for kids at our house in terms of interacting with the cat (and, incidentally, the piano as well), which is: No. Don’t play with her (or play the piano), and if you’re not listening, then you’ll have to go home. Sorry.

I just had to talk about anything else other than what the f*ck happened last night. *sigh*