Brought to you by my neighbor with poor digestive health and worse bathroom manners. Definite TMI

My nose smells more than other people. As in, if you are smoking a cigar in your car with the widows closed on a highway I can smell it from another car with closed windows levels of nose hyperactivity. Why o why does it never smell good things though? I don’t know if my apartment just happens to be built to somehow siphon off all my neighbor’s smells or what. It sucks to smell their cigarettes (even more so because it’s a non smoking building and supposedly an eviction level offense. but that’s another story). But the last few nights have brought a new horror. An unidentified neighbor is stinking up my place with their shit. As in, my entire apartment smells like someone just had diarrhea all over it. It has smelled like this for about 6 hours? Which doesn’t happen even when I have intestinal distress. So somehow my neighbor is is either not flushing their toilet or has crapped their pants and just left them lying around or I don’t know, opened a portal to every sewage system ever in their apartment for funsies. This happened last night too. I’ve gotten about 5 hours of sleep over the last 2 days.

On the one hand I do have sympathy for someone having issues with digestion, it’s never fun. But on the other OMG what the actual fuck are you doing? Have you never heard of the courtesy flush/lighting a match/opening a window/cloying air fresheners something???????


There isn’t really a polite way to knock on doors and ask if they’re the ones stinking up the joint and if so to please try not to anymore? Even if I knew for sure which neighbor it was (which I don’t) how the hell do you even broach that subject? But if this continues I’m going to wind up getting an air horn and waking up the whole fucking building with a crazed rant about poo.

Off to shower and work. Hopefully your mornings are all starting off bad smell free!