So....I told "the dude" (which is what he shall be referred to from now on) very casually that I have crohns disease and that I'm on a rather strict diet (not totally true) and that feeding me is no big deal. He wants to take me to a restaurant and pay the bill and do that whole chivalrous thing. But I keep on putting it off because...
Going to a restaurant with a man is a horrific experience for me. It can end in bliss or explosive diarrhea. One never really knows. And I just fucking hate it. I hate not knowing if I can go to some really cool Middle Eastern place for dinner. I hate having to prepare for every date with him by not eating for 24 hours beforehand. But that's my life!
I get flashbacks to before I was diagnosed and with my ex. Where I literally had to RUN to a public business on our way home and BEG to use their bathroom so that I wouldn't shit my pants. It's just fucking awful and I don't ever want to do that again. I would rather be upfront (which I have been to a minimal extent) and not have to keep this problem a secret. But I have no idea how to put it....elegantly? Without saying "hey, dude! I might shit myself if we eat there!". Ugh.
Any advice as to how I can do this? I know that poop is something that we all produce. But it's not exactly the sexiest thing I can discuss with a newish guy who I looooooove. I know he will understand, but I also want to put it in a way that wont gross him out. I also don't want it to ruin us going out to restaurants that he really likes. HELP ME!