Last night I found out that today, Cute Boy Person was leaving town to visit his parents, which he was doing every other weekend before we started dating. Last time he went, he invited me to go with him but this time he didn't, which seems perfectly reasonable. And I went "Woooooo! Me time! I'm gonna watch something he'll hate and paint my nails and drink Kraken!" And then I started actually drinking Kraken and my brain broke.

I'm not good at being vulnerable and I panic sometimes. Mid-afternoon, after a fantastic trip to the Walgreens Halloween Sale Aisle, some half-priced oreos, and some Kraken with Mexican Coke, I panicked. All of a sudden, I thought "what if he didn't invite me because he doesn't like me as much anymore!" which to be quite honest, is a stupid thing to think. He shows me every day that he likes me. He rescued my birthday from disaster. He did major cleaning in my kitchen while I sat on the couch like a lump. Last night we went out to a Halloween event and were totally that couple. That's just this week.

I realized that I was acting like I had separation anxiety! OMG I'm a dog too! Then I repeated to myself how dumb that idea was and drank faster. Eventually I fessed up on IM:

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CBP: Did you have a good day?

Me: Yes! I'm being lazy! But I got preemptive separation anxiety like a dog. Not really. Sort of.

CBP: Object permanence is not a lie!

Me: I was like "Yay! I get me time! OMG Maybe he secretly doesn't like me. Stop being a wanker, Brain!" But of course you like me. You show me that all the time, every day.

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CBP: Yes I do like you. Don't forget it, ok?

There are so many times that I have a moment of weakness or vulnerability and he swoops in and says exactly the right thing. One time he didn't. One. He's just so awesome to me that sometimes it freaks me out and even then, he calms me back down. He's such a keeper. It's scary but in a good way.


Me: Time to get up.

CBP: *grumble*

Me: Your alarm has gone off like ten times.

CBP: *mumble*

Me: What time is it?

CBP: 9:40.

Me: You'll be late for work.

CBP: No one will notice.

Me: I have to move my car by 10.

CBP: Meh.

Me: If you don't get up, I'll be forced to tell you about my dream!

CBP: I don't like where this is going. Your dreams are scary.

Me: It has Sexy Angela Lansbury.

CBP: *groan*

Me: Circa Murder, She Wrote.

CBP: I'M UP! I'M UP! STOP TALKING!

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This Angela Lansbury is much sexier, IMO. In case anyone doesn't know, she has a fine set of pipes.


Now it's manicure time!

Kraken credit.