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Sorry, GT, you get a double dose of MitsubiShe tonight, because I need some advice. I will give you happy cat pictures (or puppy pictures, please state your preference in your reply) in exchange for your tolerance and aid.

So, a little background first. This is not my first go at OKC/Internet dating. I was on for about 6 months in Texas, and went on a lot of dates. Most were mediocre, but I heard back from every single guy after the first date. Even if I wasn't interested and made it verrrry obvious during the date (that's a funny story, I should share it some time). Some resulted in second dates (and even a third date here and there), and some of the guys actually became friends of mine.


I've been on about a dozen dates since I moved here, and I would say all but 3 or 4 went really well*. When I say "really well," I mean there was some type of attraction (that felt mutual), no awkward pauses in conversation, enthusiastic talking/laughing, and all ended with a "let's do this again" or something like that. First dates have varied between coffee + a walk on the beach, to a few beers at a bar (twice we have almost closed a bar, not drinking, but talking!), and getting smoothies. I always pay my own way.

And then...nothing. At most, a few text messages are exchanged in an attempt to make future plans, but they always stop just short of setting a future date. Then...silence. I am always the last person to respond. I've had a few guys go a few weeks between contacting me and then try to say hello or something, and at that point I feel pretty okay with ignoring them or sending a quick reply that I'm not interested anymore.

I don't know what the hell is going on. This last date going radio silent has absolutely shattered my confidence. And I mean shattered.

These guys have very little in common with each other, and I'm even going on dates with guys that I wouldn't normally choose (see: Christian Hottie from last weekend). At a minimum, they pass the "dealbreaker" questions on OKC, and we have exchanged multiple messages and texts prior to meeting.


So my question is: what is wrong with me? Am I doing something wrong? I have only really been dating for about 2 years because I was in a long term relationship for the 5 1/2 years prior to that. I must be doing something wrong, but then again, if it's me, why didn't I have this problem in Texas?

*One that didn't was a guy who wanted to finish a comic book before we could "start" the date because he'd just bought it at a store and needed to find out what happened. This resulted in me drinking a Jamba Juice in silence and staring at my phone for 10 minutes before he even properly introduced himself. I did not leave because I love Jamba Juice and don't allow drinks in my car. Also, it was nice outside and I was really curious what was going to happen. I still think it was some kind of elaborate neg meant to make me uncomfortable. I told him off and left when I finished my smoothie.


Here is a happy Nemesis picture as a down payment for any advice rendered:

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