I am very good at coping. Yesterday I mostly had fun and didn't feel nervous about the biopsy results. I wasn't in denial either - it's not far from my thoughts - but I did feel calm and enjoyed the day. Today when there is a slim possibility I could hear something today I am nervous again. Anxious. Anxiety lives in the body, I think. My heart races and I feel sort of sick. And my sinus headache is back, dammit. Thank Goddess my best friend is coming to visit today. We haven't seen each other since October. She'll be here all weekend.
I think I could deal with my brain anxiety if my body would chill out. Is that weird? But the body part is really distressing. I've never had an anxiety diagnosis and this is not a familiar sensation to me. I worry but it usually has less fear in it. My daughter has anxiety. No wonder she acts out. Maybe this will give me more compassion and insight into her behavior.
Any one who struggles with anxiety want to chime in about how it feels and how you deal? I really want to take a bath but I'm still on restriction from my last surgery. Ambient music helps. Think I'll turn that on now.