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Dear February,

Fuck you.

You are the worst of months. You are the Nikki and Paolo of months. I wish you were gone forever.


I'm glad you're going away and not coming back for a year. I wish you wouldn't come back. I want to go straight from January to March. Next year, you'll be even worse, because you'll have that stupid extra day, THANKS JULIUS CAESAR. The one good thing about February is that its only 28 days and so the days of the week and dates line up with March, but next year, oh no, you're too good for that. Asshole month.


Everybody (or maybe just me)

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