I am ~12 pounds below the average weight for adult women in the U.S. and almost exactly the average height, per the CDC. I have tried for 2 weeks to find an age-appropriate (i.e., not Mother-of-the-Bride style) dress that fits my body for a fancy event tomorrow. I have not succeeded.

In the words of Trump, “Sad!” Let’s make America great again, y’all — by producing ample clothes that fit the bodies of our actual population instead of just some women.

Don’t mind me... I’ll just be over here, crying into my mac and cheeze.