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Welcome To The Bitchery

Went to the eye doctor. Got my eyes dilated. Cannot see anything. Too bright. Too blurry. Too close, too far, too wonky. How do I sit in the office for the next 6 hours and not be able to read? I don't even know if I can read what I'm writing right now. Is this worthy of a sick day? Will this hell ever end? Do they do eye transplants for things like this? Maybe I can read and answer emails using my senses of smell and taste instead of using my eyeballs? Help me.

p.s. Please only respond in BIG BOLD letters and/or sounds. Thank you.

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