or just an ex that you find yourself thinking about a lot? Alternately, did you have something like this, and then just got over it eventually?
I find myself occassionally preoccupied by a guy I dated almost two years ago, and it's bothering me. We met online, connected really powerfully, then he decided he wasn't recovered enough from his relationship with his ex and backed way off (basically, when I told him I wasn't interested in dating anyone else and was starting to develop strong feelings for him, he zipped up and ran.) The whole thing lasted for less than 4 months, but I still find that it digs at me. I'm sure a lot of this has to do with the fact that I got zero resolution from the way things ended, and that I've had an eight month (mostly self imposed) dating dry spell while I've been taking care of things and cleaning house in my own life.
He got in touch with me maybe 6 months ago, but I immediately asked him a few straight up questions about why he backed up so quickly, after professing such strong feelings for me, and why he hadn't been honest, and he ghosted again after a couple days of communication, as expected. I looked him up on facebook right after and found out he had a girlfriend. Clearly, this is not an entirely reputable person or someone I should have ended up with. Why does it keep bothering me?