I keep getting messages from one of the moderators suggesting that I send a message to someone instead of wait for someone to send a message to me.On one hand, I totally agree that it's fine for a lady to initiate the conversation if she wants to, but that is just not my style. When it comes to speaking with others, especially guys, I tend to clam up.There is so much on the line when you send a message to someone, and I am not at a level of confidence to just send a message and be able to handle whatever happens.

I'm curious: is anyone else getting messages encouraging them to make the first move? Has that advice ever actually worked?