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Embarrassing sex dreams

................please share yours so I feel better about mine.

Which I am so embarrassed by.

I had a sex dream about someone from the Vampire Diaries. That's right SOMEONE FROM A CW SHOW. I'm over 30 years old brain, what the hell. I haven't even watched the show in months!


And it wasn't even a good one... like Damon or someone. IT WAS MOPEY FREAKING STEFAN. Like c'mon. And the worst part is you know how your dreams stick with you? I am still feeling so into Stefan, the dopiest person ever.

My only defense is that in my dream he had a hairy chest, which I feel like somehow makes it better. Also in my dream he had the perfect sized penis, which I think is probably my real attraction. Of my last two sex partners (and I was in an LTR so these are like my only two sex partners in the last 8 years), one had a penis that was too big and caused problems, and the other one had a penis that was the smallest penis I've ever encountered and his balls were like to angry marbles so this dream penis was GREAT.

However, the weirdest part of my dream was we were having sex in a room upstairs while there was a party going on at their mansion, and that my friend Emily was super angry at me afterwards, because Damon had been very rude to her and shut a door in her face when she tried to come into the room where Stephen and I were having sex. Also the OTHER VERY WEIRD PART was that after he shut the door in her face, it was because he came into the sex room where we were still doing it and starting yelling at us both because apparently, there was blood all over that we hadn't noticed because I had started my period and it was alll over and he was worried about the human blood smell being all over while they had a bunch of other vampires in the house.

Which leads me to a very good question, and thank you for bringing it up dream. What would the vampires do when their human lovers got their periods and what not? Were they like...................in to it?? Also, since lady vampires can't reproduce do they stop having their periods?


This has been your morning inanity. This has been my weirdest sex dream since the Rock was involved. Thank you very much.

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