I don’t even know where to begin with this one. I’ve posted before about my ex-husband. Short version: I found out he was a compulsive liar and embezzler who had spent years racking up debt behind my back. He’s a textbook vulnerable narcissist. We’ve been divorced for a year, with a 50/50 custody arrangement with our two kids.

Recently there was a glitch on a tablet we used to share and I ended up with access to his emails and texts. Of course I read them and as a result I’m starting to get increasingly concerned with the disconnect between reality and his version of things. I won’t bore you with all the details but he was caught in a pointless lie that he spent hundreds of dollars to cover up and firmly maintained even when confronted with the truth. Like at first it was “Oh, he’s just a liar” and now it’s “Holy shit, he believes his version of the truth in a way that’s making me alarmed.” I can’t put my finger on exactly what it is about this incident that’s freaking me out when he’s lied so many times before. I go back and forth between thinking that I’m overreacting and thinking that he’s way more fucked up than I ever thought. I’m now wondering what the fuck version of reality he is presenting to our kids (two girls, 7 & 10) and what I do about it.

I don’t even know what you all could do to help me with this, even as brilliant as you are. It just happened this weekend so it’s been rattling around in my head and I needed to get it out.